Parvum Opus 340 ~ Blue Silk Stockings

Dulce, utile, et decorum est pro patria scribere.

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We Keep On Trying

Karl Popper wrote, “It is impossible to speak in such a way that you cannot be misunderstood.”

Using three negatives as in that sentence is one way to be misunderstood, but it makes his point better than:

· It is impossible to always be understood.

· It is always possible to be misunderstood.

· You cannot always be understood.

Here are more everyday examples of the possibilities of misunderstanding:

1. Listen to “Pancho and Lefty” by Townes Van Zandt; also performed by Willie Nelson and Bob Dylan, with lyrics on this web site. I also like the video with Willie and Merle Haggard. Listen, read, watch, and see what you think of these two interpretations on the Van Zandt link (note that the first two lines should read “Living on the road my friend / Was gonna keep you free and clean” instead of “Is gonna keep you free and clean”):

In this beautifully written and subtly intertwined narrative, Lefty sells out Pancho to the Federales to get the money to go back to Cleveland. "He only did what had to do." The Federales lie about the old days, Pancho is dead, and Lefty wastes away: "The desert's quiet and Cleveland's cold." The brilliance is that the three sides never meet; their interaction is entirely inferred.

Pancho was a bandit that got killed. His brother, Lefty avenged his brother's death and now he is spending the rest of his days runnning from the law.

The first comment is better written, spelled, and punctuated, showing that the writer reads more and may be a better literary interpreter. However, I don’t know what he means by the three sides never meeting since the Federales definitely met with somebody. On the other hand, there’s evidence in the lyrics that Lefty sold out Pancho and is remorseful in Cleveland.

2. John McC, a mathematician, wrote vis a vis my question about the necessity of the ebola virus:

I believe the Ebola virus, and all viri, are not considered to be "living" and thus not a species, they are pieces of genetic material, which can replicate parasitically. The human Ebola virus is more like humans than it is like other viri.

I guess this means we need to define “living”. You go first. Anyway, does the Ebola become human-like when it eats us or do we become Ebolic? Do we become like cows when we eat a steak?

On my speculating on the necessity of good, bad, and ugly viruses in general, Mike Sykes wrote:

I've always felt that way about the lesser spotted owl or the greater crested newt. But I'm sure you've realised you've raised a number of not necessarily related questions. I seem to remember that the case for keeping the smallpox virus is based on its potential usefulness in developing vaccines for viruses yet to appear. Of course, nations have developed (illegal) chemical weapons in case they need them for retaliation — this is a tricky area. Plant diversity is valued for the possible discovery of useful compounds such as taxol.

3. On the windmills, Dave DaBee wrote:

Windmills kill a lot of bats, too. It's the cause of a whole wind farm near the Cape being blocked for years.

I’d always thought it was the NIMBY factor (not in my backyard). Fred works in a huge glass building that kills birds. They think they’re flying into more sky, then they smack against the glass. Should we accept windmills as we do glass buildings and roadkill? Maybe, if windmills were more efficient.

4. Herb H. isn’t giving up on “necker knob”:

The term "bluenose" applied not to just anyone who used the term, but those who gave the spinner the name "necker knob" out of choice ("spinner" is a LOT easier to say) as a pejorative against anyone who might drive with one arm around his girl. Even in the 1950s, "necker knob" was a bizarre term and "necking" a fairly bizarre word — I for one never understood what the neck had to do with anything.

I rather expected the term "bluenose" to be recognized as one used a lot by H. L. Mencken. Who, I believe, used a definition of someone haunted by the pervasive fear that somehow somewhere someone might be having fun.

Of course we have or used to have “blue laws” such as those that prohibited the sale of alcohol on Sundays. “Bluestockings” were educated women who accused of wearing ugly blue wool stockings instead of black silk. Risque comedians use “blue material”.

Anyway, even though I knew not of necker knobs, I did know of necking, which wasn’t bizarre where I lived. It meant making out above the neck, the carnal Mason-Dixon line. As Jesse Winchester wrote, “Me, I want to live with my feet in Dixie / And my head in the cool blue North.” (Does “making out” need to be explained?) Fred noted that alliteration was part of the charm of “necker knob” even though “spinner” is one syllable shorter.

5. On NPR, someone said that people on the right have been trying to present the recently late Ted Kennedy as “unappealing”. “Unappealing” is someone who doesn’t trim his nose hair. Leaving a woman to die demands a stronger word. Or have I misunderstood something again?

Trewly Pair

David Rogerson wrote from England that “trews is very much a Scottish word and means trouser (pants to you) made in Tartan” thus answering Anne DaBee’s query. She wrote, “After all, one MUST have an answer to the perennial question "What do they wear under the kilts?"

And Dave DaBee wrote, “My impression is that ‘pants’ in England (to this day) refers to undies. The Brits I know talk about trousers.”

Mike Sykes from England once more helpfully sent these two Oxford English Dictionary entries and confirmed Dave on pants/trousers:

OED: I heard an American student at Cambridge University telling some English friends how he climbed over a locked gate…and tore his pants, and one of them asked in confusion, ‘But how could you tear your pants without tearing your trousers?'

And:

OED: 1996 Woman's Day (Sydney) 10 June 37/2 (caption) This ever-popular boot style works very well under long-line skirts, boot-legged jeans and pants.

Mike then remarked:

I know what boot-legged means (nothing to do with illicit liquo(u)r), but there's evidently a distinction between jeans and pants that eludes me.

Jeans are pants but pants aren’t always jeans. Jeans are denim pants. Blue jeans. And when I wrote “Once more into the breach” about britches, Mike said “Surely you jest!” Well, yeah. But don’t call me Shirley.

New-Fire Words

Rich Lederer sent “A Man of New-Fire Words” from his book The Miracle of Language, about Shakespeare’s words. (It’s too long to include here but you should be able to find it in Google Books. Better yet, buy the entire book.) Lederer wrote, “Of the 20,138 basewords that Shakespeare employs in his plays, sonnets, and other poems, his is the first known use of over 1,700 of them.” Lederer also said that in some cases these words were first seen in print in Shakespeare’s work, but he did use an enormous vocabulary and was endlessly inventive.

In class today I explained to a student that although he constructed a word correctly — “I was cutting the bread uncarefully” — for whatever reason, the word we actually have is “carelessly”. So many possible English constructions haven’t stuck for some reason. But Shakespeare’s coinages often so precisely express an idea that they’ve lasted for centuries. However, what is brilliant in Shakespeare can become trite in the wrong hands.

“That love affair was the be-all and end-all for the once stony-hearted girl who was no longer fancy-free; though her towering passion made her a laughing-stock, she was tongue-tied yet hot-blooded and green-eyed with jealousy. It was a foregone conclusion that she would go off half-cocked someday.” — If you’ve read this more in sorrow than in anger, you know Shakespeare.

That stack of familiar phrases assembled from Rich Lederer’s article looks like a writing handbook for a bad romance novel.

My Examiner.com This Week

Clarification: I’ve been writing for Examiner.com for a few weeks. This is where I’m putting most of my political commentary, which should reduce the PO irritation factor.

Shrink bills to match Congressmen's capacity to read them

Thursday, September 24th, 2009

The health care bill and protests thereto have pushed off the front pages the nationalization of large auto...

The politics of church reform

Sunday, September 20th, 2009

Sister Louise Akers and volunteer religion teacher Carol Egner have been prohibited from teaching in Cincinnati...

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ONLINE PUBS

I’m publishing for the Kindle digital reader with Amazon and now also on Lulu.com for download to computer and for printing. Most of these titles are available in both locations. Search for Rhonda Keith on Amazon.com Kindle store and Lulu.com.

The Man from Scratch is about cloning, escort services, murder, and restaurants in Akron, Ohio, featuring Roxy Barbarino, writer for Adventuress Magazine. Novel.

A Walk Around Stonehaven is a travel article on my trip to Scotland. Short article with photos. (Lulu.com only.)

The Wish Book is fantasy-suspense-romance featuring the old Sears Roebuck catalogues. Novella.

Carl Kriegbaum Sleeps with the Corn is about a young gambler who finds himself upright in a cornfield in Kansas with his feet encased in a tub of concrete; how would you get out of a spot like that? Short story.

Still Ridge is about a young woman who moves from Boston to Appalachia and finds there are two kinds of moonshine, the good kind and the kind that can kill you. Short story.

Whither Spooning? asks whether synchronized spooning can be admitted to the 2010 Winter Olympics. Humorous sports article.

Blood, Sweat, Tears, and Cats: One woman's tale of menopause, in which I learn that the body is predictive; I perceive that I am like my cat; and I find love. Autobiographical essay.

Parvum Opus Volume I. The first year (December 2002 through 2003). You’ll laugh, you’ll cry, you’ll get PO’ed. Collection of columns.

10% discount on my Lulu publications:

Browse to: http://www.lulu.com/landing/lulu_coupon_10?a=4001629

Click "Buy" and enter 'BESTSELLER10' at checkout.

Save 10% on your order.

NEW PRODUCTS:

Scot Tartans: T-shirts and more (custom orders available).

T-Shirts & mug: FRESH PICT, with two ancient Pictish designs

BUMPER STICKER: FRESH PICT, white on blue, with 10th Century Pict-Scot Merman Cross (blue on white also available)

SIGG WATER BOTTLE, ORGANIC T-SHIRTS IN GREAT COLORS, MINI-CAMERAS, DENIM SHIRTS, MUGS, TOTE BAGS, MOUSE PAD, TEDDY BEAR, AND MUCH MORE AT Parvum Opus CafePress shop: (NOTE: There are problems viewing this site with Firefox but Earthlink seems OK.)

NEW: FRESH PICT items

Graphic covers of my books

Dulce, Utile, et Decorum (Sweet, Useful, and Proper), title of new collection of Parvum Opus, Volume I

BUMPER STICKER: Dulce, Utile, et Decorum

No Pain, No Pain

Star o’ the Bar

Veritas Vincit (Truth Conquers) with Keith clan Catti insignia

Flash in the Pants

If you're so smart why aren't you me?

PWE (Protestant Work Ethic)

I am here maternity tops

I eat dead things (doggy shirt, pet dishes, and BBQ apron)

If you don’t see exactly what you want — a particular design or text on a particular item — let me know and I’ll customize products for you.

______________________________________________

Trivium pursuit ~ rhetoric, grammar, and logic, or reading, writing, and reckoning: Parvum Opus discusses language, education, journalism, culture, and more. Parvum Opus by Rhonda Keith is a publication of KeithOps / Opus Publishing Services. Editorial input provided by Fred Stephens. Rhonda Keith is a long-time writer, editor, and English teacher. Back issues from December 2002 may be found at http://www.geocities.com/keithops/; 2009 issues are at http://cafelit.blogspot.com.. Feel free to e-mail me with comments or queries. The PO mailing list is private, never given or sold to anyone else. If you don't want to receive Parvum Opus, please e-mail, and I'll take you off the mailing list. Copyright Rhonda Keith 2009. Parvum Opus or part of it may be reproduced only with permission, but you may forward the entire newsletter as long as the copyright remains.

Parvum Opus 339 ~ Faugh an Ballagh

Dogs and Grannies

David Rogerson reminded me from England that Shakespeare coined many words in common use today, including leapfrog and salad. “Salad” has an older Latin/Italian origin so my guess is that Shakespeare Anglicized it. I’d have to check the Oxford English Dictionary to delve any further.

David also introduced his note by saying “I expect I am telling my granny to suck eggs.” I was rather taken aback as this is not a phrase I’m familiar with. I know “egg-sucking dog” and was prepared to take offense but I realized: 1. a granny is not a dog; 2. I’m not old enough to be David’s granny; 3. there’s probably a difference between the egg-sucking of grannies and dogs.

Telling granny to suck eggs means telling telling somebody something she already knows very well, like a child would explain to granny how to poke holes in a raw egg to suck it. Since I never did that and would have found raw eggs revolting, the meaning wasn’t intuitive to me. (Although I did learn how to poke holes in eggs to blow the egg out, so you could decorate the empty egg for Easter.) An egg-sucking dog sneaks around in the hen house, though why and how a dog would suck eggs instead of crunching the shell, I don’t know. An egg-sucking dog is a dog you would chase with a shotgun. Granny is allowed to suck eggs.

Pants and Slacks

In the old Tracey and Hepburn movie, Pat and Mike, Hepburn’s annoying fiancé tells her to change from her pants into a skirt. She says, “These aren’t pants, these are slacks.” I don’t have a sense of distinction between the two as clothing, only as words. Slacks sounds a bit more formal only because it’s used less often. Slacks can be any pants, even if not part of a suit, ergo, more casual. You would expect the legs to be relatively loose fitting. From and for slackers?

Pants: from French PantalonPantalone, name of a character in Italian comedy, from the Venetian patron saint Pantalone or Pantaleone (pantos, panto- + leōn, lion): also, the garment worn by this character. Pants are tight in the legs.

Trousers: from obsolete trousetriubhas, trews. I’ve read “trews” somewhere but don’t know if was used as an intentional archaism, or if I read it in an old piece of literature.

Britches obviously comes from breeches, as in “Once more into the…!”

Word of the Weak

The 9/14/90 issue of Newsweek headlines the story “Is Your Baby Racist?” with a cover photo of a white baby though theoretically the racism research extended to selected humans divided by two racial classifications. I didn’t think the story would be edifying and read only the callouts, which give a pretty good idea of the gist of the article:

“Kids as young as six months judge others based on skin color.”

Infants as young as six months can also usually tell the difference between their mother and their father, and between familiar faces and strangers. What if a white baby has a black nanny, huh?

“Children will see racial differences as much as they see the difference between pink and blue.”

Be glad your child isn’t color blind or just plain blind.

“Minority children who are told repeatedly of discrimination are less likely to see a connection between hard work and success.”

Well, duh.

“Black children who hear messages of ethnic pride are more engaged in school and more likely to attribute their successes to effort and ability.”

But don’t tell white children about ethnic pride.

I still haven’t read the whole article but, only a review so far. The authors and editors interpret the rather lame research to be about innate racism, when it’s really about the ability of infants and children to make visual distinctions. Some of the study was of infants, but some was of children old enough to have been exposed to lots of TV as well as people. No comparison.

I guess it’s true that racism has to be taught, and Newsweek is doing its bit to teach it.

Second Weak Word

Green has turned quickly into a marketing label, as you may have noticed. While conservation and care are valuable, let us think before diving into what might end up being a layer of green algae on a stagnant pool.

1. Windmills kill a lot of birds.

2. Those energy-saving fluorescent curly light bulbs contain mercury and are more trouble to dispose of safely than a lot of people are probably going to bother with.

3. Humans are pretty inventive but we are not able to create the number, kind, and extremes of cycles that the earth and evolutionary species have already gone through.

4. Do we want to protect all species, such as the ebola virus, for instance? If everything that exists (depending on your druthers, everything created or spontaneously or accidentally existing) is necessary to the cycle of life, why have so many species disappeared without our help? The earth and the universe continued nicely without them. Now, do we need the ebola virus? Do we need the tiny fish that are being preserved at the expense of the California farmlands, which need irrigation? Why do some people want to preserve the tiny fish (which we don’t eat) but get rid of people?

5. A local building advertises “Green Space Available”. Maybe it means they’ve built in the latest energy-saving technology, which is good. But according to some builders, the greenest buildings are the old buildings still standing.

Weakness

And speaking of weak words, don’t forget, “Pain is weakness leaving the body.”

This and That

[+] Bill R. wrote:

Going along with the “necker knob” (which, in my small town, was not generally used by teenagers because it was considered an “old folks” apparatus) is a characterization that’s been obsolete since bucket seats came into widespread use: “DDH” or “d****d door hugger,” applied to a young lady whose affection for the passenger side door outweighed her affection for the driver.

[+] Ben W. used the phrase “Ye glads” instead of “Ye gods”. Cute.

[+] A TV show was advertised “When animals strike”. For some reason I first thought of animals organizing and going on strike, maybe from too much news and politics in my brain.

[+] Father Robert Barron on YouTube comments on the culture in the series World on Fire, and usually he’s thoughtful and interesting. But in his review of the new movie District 9 — I haven’t seen it but it’s an alien monster movie — Fr. Barron laments that the humans “dehumanize” the aliens by calling them “prawns”. In fact, they are NOT humans so they can’t be “dehumanized”. I gather that this is one of those stories that’s supposed to teach us that just because they don’t look like us, that’s no reason to etc. etc. etc. Like, put yourself in the place of aliens in the Alien movie series: of course you’d want to incorporate a human into your body for breeding or nutritional purposes or whatever you needed if you were one of them, just like we eat animals and innocent fruits and tubers and legumes. No difference between you and a bean sprout, except that the sprout is not a human.

[+] In the 1946 movie, Till the End of Time, San Diego is referred to as “Dago”. I rewound it and listened twice to make sure I hadn’t misheard it. I’ve never heard this anywhere else but it is analogous to “Frisco” for San Francisco. (The movie isn’t readily available but try to catch it on TV.) San Franciscans don’t like “Frisco” but it’s still around. I suppose “Dago” could have disappeared because it’s also an unfriendly slang word for Italian (or Spanish or Portuguese).

[+] Have fun with magazines by putting your photo on a cover at Fake Magazine Cover online.

[+] Town & Country magazine says a row of antique stores in Hudson, New York, “leads to a bucolic riverside promenade”. They didn’t have photos of the promenade but anything that close to 1. a body of water and 2. a row of antique stores probably isn’t terribly rural looking or suitable for pasturing sheep.

[+] On a TV text crawler: “Our dynamic do woe…”

[+] This summer I went with my brother to an Irish club, basically a private bar for the Irish and friends. The motto of their Celtic Guard Curling Club is “Trample the wounded, hurdle the dead.” I need to get the T-shirt. This would an extension of the Irish battle cry “Faugh an Ballagh” (among other spellings) meaning “clear the way”.

This Week in Examiner.com

Objection to Obama's policies is anti-white

Wednesday, September 16th, 2009

Ex-president Jimmy Carter said yesterday that he believes most of the protest against Obama's policies is really...
Yale sells its freedom of speech

Tuesday, September 15th, 2009

Yale University, whose motto is Lux et Veritas (Light and Truth) has inflicted upon itself a disturbing piece of...
New Hampshire forces child into public school

Sunday, September 13th, 2009

A New Hampshire court has ordered a home-schooled child to be sent to public school. Although the issue is merely...

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ONLINE PUBS

I’m publishing for the Kindle digital reader with Amazon and now also on Lulu.com for download to computer and for printing. Most of these titles are available in both locations. Search for Rhonda Keith on Amazon.com Kindle store and Lulu.com.

The Man from Scratch is about cloning, escort services, murder, and restaurants in Akron, Ohio, featuring Roxy Barbarino, writer for Adventuress Magazine. Novel.

A Walk Around Stonehaven is a travel article on my trip to Scotland. Short article with photos. (Lulu.com only.)

The Wish Book is fantasy-suspense-romance featuring the old Sears Roebuck catalogues. Novella.

Carl Kriegbaum Sleeps with the Corn is about a young gambler who finds himself upright in a cornfield in Kansas with his feet encased in a tub of concrete; how would you get out of a spot like that? Short story.

Still Ridge is about a young woman who moves from Boston to Appalachia and finds there are two kinds of moonshine, the good kind and the kind that can kill you. Short story.

Whither Spooning? asks whether synchronized spooning can be admitted to the 2010 Winter Olympics. Humorous sports article.

Blood, Sweat, Tears, and Cats: One woman's tale of menopause, in which I learn that the body is predictive; I perceive that I am like my cat; and I find love. Autobiographical essay.

Parvum Opus Volume I. The first year (December 2002 through 2003). You’ll laugh, you’ll cry, you’ll get PO’ed. Collection of columns.

10% discount on my Lulu publications:

Browse to: http://www.lulu.com/landing/lulu_coupon_10?a=4001629

Click "Buy" and enter 'BESTSELLER10' at checkout.

Save 10% on your order.

NEW PRODUCTS:

Scot Tartans: T-shirts and more (custom orders available).

T-Shirts & mug: FRESH PICT, with two ancient Pictish designs

BUMPER STICKER: FRESH PICT, white on blue, with 10th Century Pict-Scot Merman Cross (blue on white also available)

SIGG WATER BOTTLE, ORGANIC T-SHIRTS IN GREAT COLORS, MINI-CAMERAS, DENIM SHIRTS, MUGS, TOTE BAGS, MOUSE PAD, TEDDY BEAR, AND MUCH MORE AT Parvum Opus CafePress shop: (NOTE: There are problems viewing this site with Firefox but Earthlink seems OK.)

NEW: FRESH PICT items

Graphic covers of my books

Dulce, Utile, et Decorum (Sweet, Useful, and Proper), title of new collection of Parvum Opus, Volume I

BUMPER STICKER: Dulce, Utile, et Decorum

No Pain, No Pain

Star o’ the Bar

Veritas Vincit (Truth Conquers) with Keith clan Catti insignia

Flash in the Pants

If you're so smart why aren't you me?

PWE (Protestant Work Ethic)

I am here maternity tops

I eat dead things (doggy shirt, pet dishes, and BBQ apron)

If you don’t see exactly what you want — a particular design or text on a particular item — let me know and I’ll customize products for you.

______________________________________________

Trivium pursuit ~ rhetoric, grammar, and logic, or reading, writing, and reckoning: Parvum Opus discusses language, education, journalism, culture, and more. Parvum Opus by Rhonda Keith is a publication of KeithOps / Opus Publishing Services. Editorial input provided by Fred Stephens. Rhonda Keith is a long-time writer, editor, and English teacher. Back issues from December 2002 may be found at http://www.geocities.com/keithops/; 2009 issues are at http://cafelit.blogspot.com.. Feel free to e-mail me with comments or queries. The PO mailing list is private, never given or sold to anyone else. If you don't want to receive Parvum Opus, please e-mail, and I'll take you off the mailing list. Copyright Rhonda Keith 2009. Parvum Opus or part of it may be reproduced only with permission, but you may forward the entire newsletter as long as the copyright remains.

Parvum Opus 338 ~ Rememberies

More on Necker Knobs

From Anne DaBee:

Okay — re necker's knobs", which is the name my 80-year-old remembery recalls: the knob was on the left for left-handed driving, leaving the right hand free for whatever it wanted to try to get away with, assuming a female passenger... That's MY story, and I'm sticking to it. And I don't believe I'm a "blue nose", thank you, and certainly not male. I also don't believe I told Dave a whatever-knob could get stuck in either his chest or his sleeve, but a desperate mother can say strange things, and sometimes fear is more effective than a thousand words of good advice.

I agree with Anne. Don’t know why Herb H. called people blue noses who used the term necker knobs. According to Fred, the people who used the term were usually jocks who used the knobs, but oddly enough, not the car guys, the street drag racers, car modifiers, and so on.

And from Bill R:

“Risking death to look cool is the ultimate in cool.”

Remember the fighter pilot’s credo: “I’d rather die than look bad.”

A variation on “Death before dishonor.”

Floy Floy Revisited

I could make an entire career writing about floy floy. Somewhere in the world right now, someone is thinking about floy floy and may find the Parvum Opus columns about it. Here’s the newest entry and a most interesting one, from new reader Ben W.

I read your post on the Slim Slam song, found it interesting, and wanted to add my two cents. I'm Black, adopted into a white family, enjoy House music, am familiar with elements of club culture, and grew up listening to 50's doo wop and rock and roll. [Note: Ben told me he’s 40 years old, when I asked, so he was listening to 50s music after the fact.]

Floogie: a male reference. The flat-foot reference seems to be male in this case. I'm sure a female could have been told she was flat-footed but she would have to be a very bad dancer perhaps with male-ish attributes. Generally flat-footed was a term used with males. Floogie could be good (hip or a hipster thus a play on words) or bad (a hip slacker or just a slacker).

Floy floy: a feminine reference. An easy person.

When I read the lyrics I see two hip or semi hip people out on the town. They are skating through life, living fast, and perhaps involved in an illegal activity.

I heard that Little Richard (LR) developed his version of Tutti Frutti from Slim & Slam and what piqued my interest was LR's reference to an*al sex in the original dittie. With that in mind I thought Slim & Slam may have been making similar innuendo in some of their songs. I think this is the wrong track, however; I think it is good to think of the two terms as masculine and feminine. Not that the actual genders match the roles. [*Asterisk inserted to evade filters. Not sure what the reference was in Tutti Frutti, though.]

I think the reference to "get those floy floys straight" is fascinating and potentially revealing. Set them straight as in straighten up and fly right, clean up your act, lead an upright life, or get your act together? I think this may be the case. If floy floy's are boys then would they need to be "straightened" out? I am not familiar with Black gay culture in the 1930's so I do not know if the term "straight" would be used.

Ben’s second note:

Black cultural aesthetics are so interesting: reinventing meaning — bad/good, defining and promoting one's own heroes, and defining positive and negative based on the subject's intent, not inherent value, among other things. After a closer reading I'm wondering if the lighthearted feel good song is an homage to jitterbuggers, floogies, and floy-floys. People (floogies and floy-floys) seen in a negative light who can actually help alleviate/take your troubles away? Sounds similar to the perception some people held of black folk in the 1930’s. A veiled allegory? A party song? Are Floogies and Floys-Floys heroes or anti-heroes? Did the jitterbuggers see themselves as floogies and floys-floys?

The last sentence “Well, all right then; get those floy-floys straight!” takes on interesting possible meanings given these questions.

Appreciating your floy-floy.

A lot to chew on here. Again, here’s a link to the song by Slim Gaillard. And another one, the complete recording by Slim and Slam. And here it is by The Mills Brothers and Louis Armstrong. It’s just too good.

Idiots Are the New Dummies (She Screamed)

Contribution from another new reader, Rebecca R.:

ripped from the headlines --- an Amazon book review i found…we've officially reached the end of culture. Welcome to the new depths of mediocrity:

2.0 out of 5 stars overly complicated
For a "Dummies" book, this was overly complicated and difficult to read. If you need clearer information, I would recommend the complete idiots guide. Published 3 months ago by C. Tuley

Bee & Flower

Perhaps you’ve used Bee & Flower soap from Shanghai, China. I first saw it when my brother brought a box home as a gift from Vietnam. It seemed wonderfully exotic then; I’ve since bought it in Chinese groceries here. Beautifully packaged in flowered paper with a pretty paper band around it and a gold seal, it has a charming promotional insert in four languages, Chinese, French, Spanish, and English. So often packaging material from abroad features some pretty entertaining English, but this is almost perfect, with only a couple of dubious constructions:

“Bee & Flower” Rose Soap

Another sparkling product of “Bee & Flower” brand

We now recommend you a new product of ROSE scented soap for your enjoyment. It is made of selected materials and natural ROSE essence, which gives you a delightful and lasting fragrance. Just give it a try and you’ll no doubt be convinced.

First, it should be “recommend to you”. Perhaps the writer confused the indirect with the direct object construction (“we recommend the soap”), or confused the verb with tell or sell (“we tell you about the soap”; “we sell you the soap”). I also thought you’d have to be convinced before you buy the product, but that’s just quibbling. You may have doubts, and still purchase.

The Sandalwood Bee & Flower soap description on Amazon.com tells us the manufacturer is Prince of Peace, and is even more seductive, in a refined way, with no discernable errors though again the convincing time line is a little confusing; that is, using the soap is convincing after you’ve bought it, but the promo must convince before purchasing, except that the printed material is sealed inside the wrapper:

Bee & Flower Sandalwood Soap gently and luxuriously cleanses the skin and has a pleasing sandalwood scent. It is so delightful to your skin! Our "Bee & Flower" Sandalwood Soap, made from selected materials, gives you delightful and lasting fragrance. It not only possesses all the merits a sandalwood scented soap may have, but also does no harm whatever to your skin. Just try it, and you will see our sincere recommendation is rather convincing.

Rather!

Los Angeles

Lately I’ve heard Los Angeles pronounced with a hard G in movies from the 1950s — Ang-el-es, which must have been in common use then and there, keeping in mind that those movies were made in Hollywood. Los Angeles grew from a small town founded in the 18th century and of course the Spanish pronunciation is An-hel-es. Since the ‘50s, pronunciation seems to have stabilized in the Anglicized version with the G sound of the City of Angels: An-jel-ez.

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ONLINE PUBS

I’m publishing for the Kindle digital reader with Amazon and now also on Lulu.com for download to computer and for printing. Most of these titles are available in both locations. Search for Rhonda Keith on Amazon.com Kindle store and Lulu.com.

The Man from Scratch is about cloning, escort services, murder, and restaurants in Akron, Ohio, featuring Roxy Barbarino, writer for Adventuress Magazine. Novel.

A Walk Around Stonehaven is a travel article on my trip to Scotland. Short article with photos. (Lulu.com only.)

The Wish Book is fantasy-suspense-romance featuring the old Sears Roebuck catalogues. Novella.

Carl Kriegbaum Sleeps with the Corn is about a young gambler who finds himself upright in a cornfield in Kansas with his feet encased in a tub of concrete; how would you get out of a spot like that? Short story.

Still Ridge is about a young woman who moves from Boston to Appalachia and finds there are two kinds of moonshine, the good kind and the kind that can kill you. Short story.

Whither Spooning? asks whether synchronized spooning can be admitted to the 2010 Winter Olympics. Humorous sports article.

Blood, Sweat, Tears, and Cats: One woman's tale of menopause, in which I learn that the body is predictive; I perceive that I am like my cat; and I find love. Autobiographical essay.

Parvum Opus Volume I. The first year (December 2002 through 2003). You’ll laugh, you’ll cry, you’ll get PO’ed. Collection of columns.

10% discount on my Lulu publications:

Browse to: http://www.lulu.com/landing/lulu_coupon_10?a=4001629

Click "Buy" and enter 'BESTSELLER10' at checkout.

Save 10% on your order.

NEW PRODUCTS:

Scot Tartans: T-shirts and more (custom orders available).

T-Shirts & mug: FRESH PICT, with two ancient Pictish designs

BUMPER STICKER: FRESH PICT, white on blue, with 10th Century Pict-Scot Merman Cross (blue on white also available)

SIGG WATER BOTTLE, ORGANIC T-SHIRTS IN GREAT COLORS, MINI-CAMERAS, DENIM SHIRTS, MUGS, TOTE BAGS, MOUSE PAD, TEDDY BEAR, AND MUCH MORE AT Parvum Opus CafePress shop: (NOTE: There are problems viewing this site with Firefox but Earthlink seems OK.)

NEW: FRESH PICT items

Graphic covers of my books

Dulce, Utile, et Decorum (Sweet, Useful, and Proper), title of new collection of Parvum Opus, Volume I

BUMPER STICKER: Dulce, Utile, et Decorum

No Pain, No Pain

Star o’ the Bar

Veritas Vincit (Truth Conquers) with Keith clan Catti insignia

Flash in the Pants

If you're so smart why aren't you me?

PWE (Protestant Work Ethic)

I am here maternity tops

I eat dead things (doggy shirt, pet dishes, and BBQ apron)

If you don’t see exactly what you want — a particular design or text on a particular item — let me know and I’ll customize products for you.

______________________________________________

Trivium pursuit ~ rhetoric, grammar, and logic, or reading, writing, and reckoning: Parvum Opus discusses language, education, journalism, culture, and more. Parvum Opus by Rhonda Keith is a publication of KeithOps / Opus Publishing Services. Editorial input provided by Fred Stephens. Rhonda Keith is a long-time writer, editor, and English teacher. Back issues from December 2002 may be found at http://www.geocities.com/keithops/; 2009 issues are at http://cafelit.blogspot.com.. Feel free to e-mail me with comments or queries. The PO mailing list is private, never given or sold to anyone else. If you don't want to receive Parvum Opus, please e-mail, and I'll take you off the mailing list. Copyright Rhonda Keith 2009. Parvum Opus or part of it may be reproduced only with permission, but you may forward the entire newsletter as long as the copyright remains.

Parvum Opus 337 ~ Mood Irrealis

Hair o’ the Hare

I’m not going to look this up, but shouldn’t “hair brained plot” (which I read in a blog) be “hare brained plot”? That is, as stupid as something a rabbit would dream up. Of course you might argue that a hair is even less intelligent than a rabbit.

Hubbies

Ben and Jerry’s has changed the name of its “Chubby Hubby” ice cream to “Hubby Hubby” in honor of the same-sex marriage law in Vermont. It’s a temporary change, just for the month of September. I think they should have rolled out an entirely new flavor, because it sort of makes me think of someone’s hubby changing his sexual preference mid-scoop. Not a good idea.

Preacher Curl

We’ve joined a new gym with lots of new machines by several different manufacturers. One is a bicep curl called Preacher Curl. Fred has heard of that, I haven’t. Why would you call this machine or this exercise a preacher curl? There’s also a preacher bench for exercising. Was there a piece of furniture customarily assigned to the preacher? Fred thinks it’s an Americanism for the prie-dieu, a bench for kneeling and leaning, which the preacher bench resembles. But prie-dieu is so French and so Catholic, while preacher bench is such a Protestant term, and I don’t recall that type of furniture in a Protestant church.

Apologetics

If you’re not familiar with ecclesiastical terminology, the word apologetics may be misleading. We almost invariably use the word “apologetic” (without the S) to refer to a tone of apology, that is, expressing regret for something. So when we hear about church apologetics, it sounds like someone is apologizing for something wrong. Apologetics and related words all come from the Greek word meaning defense. Church apologetics are detailed and reasoned explanations of tenets of faith. Ordinarily I’m not in favor of abandoning words because they’re unfamiliar to the average listener or reader — get a dictionary, sez I — but this is a case where if I used the word in an ordinary classroom, I would immediately define it, or else use a different word.

There are those who even think the subjunctive can be done away with, merely because so many people don’t get it. Daily Writing Tips thinks so, but if I were you I wouldn’t bite on that one yet. If you say “If I was you” you’re still going to sound sub-literate, at least for the time being. I did learn a new term from DWT, however: irrealis. This grammatical term refers to moods in English and other languages that refer to the unreal.

And Now for a Hymn

Most people know the old hymn “Amazing Grace” by reformed slave trader John Newton. You’ve heard it at church or at a funeral or on TV or from a bagpiper. Today, people sometimes change the second line of the first verse:

Amazing grace, how sweet the sound,

That saved a wretch like me.

I once was lost but now am found,

Was blind, but now I see.

Now you might hear:

Amazing grace, how sweet the sound

That saved and set me free.

John Newton knew he was a wretch. Wretch, by the way, descends from an Anglo-Saxon word meaning exile. I don’t know if it retained any of that sense in the 18th century when Newton wrote the song, though Newton must have felt exiled from God. Today it just means some who’s miserable or vile, and who probably has poor self-esteem. Here’s my suggestion for another variation:

Amazing grace, how sweet the sound

That saved my self esteem.

I stumbled across an interesting version of the song by The Dropkick Murphys, a Boston punk band, which keeps the word “wretch” but is interspersed with (it’s hard to make it out) their own song, “Good Rats”, about “a little lad named vermin McCann / who fell upon a drink that made him feel like quite a man”. The good rats eventually sink in the beer. Funny guys, those Murphys. They know a false paradise when they taste it.

Shine On

Anne DaBee suspected I might have meant “eke out your pension with a little moonlighting on the side” instead of “eke out your pension with a little moonshining on the side.” No, I meant moonshining. She went on:

Sounds good to me, and might be more profitable (and ultimately more fun) than the more usual "moonlighting". But then there's the nuisance of making a still, and what I've been told is the highly unpleasant smell of the actual distilling. Guess I'll stick with the moonlighting.

It is a nuisance, and vermin will fall into the still. Literally. My dad told the story of going to buy moonshine in the hills of West Virginia when he was a lad, but he changed his mind when he spotted rats floating in the ‘shine.

Anne also recounted another restaurant scam which was much like the scene in the movie Victor, Victoria, but she said “this was the brainchild of a TEACHER — who thought he was terribly clever, and saw nothing wrong with what he'd done. Glad none of MY kids were in his class, and God help those who were.” Now you know better than to mention God within 100 feet of a school.

Anne concluded, “glad you're better — and healing or heeling or whatever.” Those DaBees are irrepressible.

Inspiration

President Obama is planning to speak to school children and there’s been some grumbling that the federal government is interfering with curriculum, which is outside its scope. There’s nothing wrong with a president speaking to students. My objection might be to some of the questions, such as, How does President Obama inspire you? Things like that. Too much like a cult of personality. Schoolchildren should be studying the principles on which the country was founded, not the inspirational personality of a politician.

Spinner, Necker, Suicide, Brodie . . .

Herb H. wrote at technical length about the famous knob:

I wanted to mention that another name for the steering wheel spinner was Brodie knob. I capitalize Brodie because I always assumed it was originally someone's proper name. One definition for "brodie" was half a donut. It was the act of turning a very tight turn, portion of a circle, under maximum power so that the rear (driving) wheels were on the verge of breaking loose or actually did break loose and spin — which resulted in sideways skid of the rear wheels and an even tighter turn. I've heard it described as "laying down a brodie," though in my memory it was almost always said to "cut a brodie" or "cut a few brodies." If a brodie continued its tight turn through a circle, that was a "donut," cutting a donut. Reversing direction after each half circle would continue travel in one general direction, cutting a string of brodies. I didn't drive to school, but often rode to lunch with others … who embraced the practice of cutting a few final brodies on entering the school parking lot when returning from lunch. It was terrific for blowing off a little steam before going back into school for the afternoon. And it looked so cool that a bunch of other kids started imitating it as they in turn came across the school parking lot.

Okay, the knobs. I agree they were often called "necker knobs," primarily by old blue noses (of any age, mostly male). Reports of their being outlawed I believe are greatly exaggerated. The knobs remained useful on industrial (fork lift) trucks for many years. On cars, not so much. American cars in the 1940s and early 50s had big heavy engines and transmissions weighing down on the front wheels. Before power steering, they required far greater mechanical advantage just to be able to turn the steering wheel at low speed. It took a lot of turns of the steering wheel to move the front wheels from left lock to right lock or right to left. Car magazines used to report on steering responsiveness by giving the number of "turns lock to lock" in the report of a car test drive. Three turns lock to lock was about as fast as one could hope for out of Detroit, while 4 and a half turns lock to lock meant you had to do a lot of cranking of that wheel. Barry S. once said that you turn the wheel and the matter gets referred to a subcommittee.

Actual use as a "necker knob" probably gave rise to some problems that supported the blue noses in their castigation of "suicide knobs." Well, there were other reasons too for left-hand placement of the knob. For gooder or worser purposes, placing the knob for use in the left hand had some drawbacks. Many right-handed drivers didn't have either the strength or the control in the left arm and hand to turn over the (manual) steering job to that member. Vigorous driving often called for precise steering. Over-doing it with the left hand trying to control through that knob might result in a turnover (of a truck, probably not a car). If a front wheel in the process of cornering hit an unyielding obstacle — or perhaps went into a hole in the pavement — it COULD happen that the steering wheel would be knocked backward very forcefully. Again, more risk in a truck than a car. In that event a bare steering wheel would be hard to hold onto. A knob on the wheel could and reportedly did break the hand (thumb) that was hammered by the knob. Wherever that right hand was, it was needed very quickly in such a circumstance and possibly not available.

That kick-back of the steering wheel was more of a problem with a rack and pinion steering gear than with the worm and roller gear that was much more common on the big American cars of the day. I think it was also more of a problem in trucks because their steering wheels often operated in a more horizontal plane and they featured much bigger wheels on the pavement.

Herb recommended I buy one. It would look cool in my aging PT Cruiser… But Dave DaBee wrote:

Huh, I was told (lord knows by whom, long ago) that "suicide knob" was because in a crash it could puncture your chest. Your explanation makes more sense. AntiqueWish refers to "the unfortunate result of getting the knob stuck in your sleeve."

Risking death to look cool is the ultimate in cool.

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______________________________________________

ONLINE PUBS

I’m publishing for the Kindle digital reader with Amazon and now also on Lulu.com for download to computer and for printing. Most of these titles are available in both locations. Search for Rhonda Keith on Amazon.com Kindle store and Lulu.com.

The Man from Scratch is about cloning, escort services, murder, and restaurants in Akron, Ohio, featuring Roxy Barbarino, writer for Adventuress Magazine. Novel.

A Walk Around Stonehaven is a travel article on my trip to Scotland. Short article with photos. (Lulu.com only.)

The Wish Book is fantasy-suspense-romance featuring the old Sears Roebuck catalogues. Novella.

Carl Kriegbaum Sleeps with the Corn is about a young gambler who finds himself upright in a cornfield in Kansas with his feet encased in a tub of concrete; how would you get out of a spot like that? Short story.

Still Ridge is about a young woman who moves from Boston to Appalachia and finds there are two kinds of moonshine, the good kind and the kind that can kill you. Short story.

Whither Spooning? asks whether synchronized spooning can be admitted to the 2010 Winter Olympics. Humorous sports article.

Blood, Sweat, Tears, and Cats: One woman's tale of menopause, in which I learn that the body is predictive; I perceive that I am like my cat; and I find love. Autobiographical essay.

Parvum Opus Volume I. The first year (December 2002 through 2003). You’ll laugh, you’ll cry, you’ll get PO’ed. Collection of columns.

10% discount on my Lulu publications:

Browse to: http://www.lulu.com/landing/lulu_coupon_10?a=4001629

Click "Buy" and enter 'BESTSELLER10' at checkout.

Save 10% on your order.

NEW PRODUCTS:

Scot Tartans: T-shirts and more (custom orders available).

T-Shirts & mug: FRESH PICT, with two ancient Pictish designs

BUMPER STICKER: FRESH PICT, white on blue, with 10th Century Pict-Scot Merman Cross (blue on white also available)

SIGG WATER BOTTLE, ORGANIC T-SHIRTS IN GREAT COLORS, MINI-CAMERAS, DENIM SHIRTS, MUGS, TOTE BAGS, MOUSE PAD, TEDDY BEAR, AND MUCH MORE AT Parvum Opus CafePress shop: (NOTE: There are problems viewing this site with Firefox but Earthlink seems OK.)

NEW: FRESH PICT items

Graphic covers of my books

Dulce, Utile, et Decorum (Sweet, Useful, and Proper), title of new collection of Parvum Opus, Volume I

BUMPER STICKER: Dulce, Utile, et Decorum

No Pain, No Pain

Star o’ the Bar

Veritas Vincit (Truth Conquers) with Keith clan Catti insignia

Flash in the Pants

If you're so smart why aren't you me?

PWE (Protestant Work Ethic)

I am here maternity tops

I eat dead things (doggy shirt, pet dishes, and BBQ apron)

If you don’t see exactly what you want — a particular design or text on a particular item — let me know and I’ll customize products for you.

______________________________________________

Trivium pursuit ~ rhetoric, grammar, and logic, or reading, writing, and reckoning: Parvum Opus discusses language, education, journalism, culture, and more. Parvum Opus by Rhonda Keith is a publication of KeithOps / Opus Publishing Services. Editorial input provided by Fred Stephens. Rhonda Keith is a long-time writer, editor, and English teacher. Back issues from December 2002 may be found at http://www.geocities.com/keithops/; 2009 issues are at http://cafelit.blogspot.com.. Feel free to e-mail me with comments or queries. The PO mailing list is private, never given or sold to anyone else. If you don't want to receive Parvum Opus, please e-mail, and I'll take you off the mailing list. Copyright Rhonda Keith 2009. Parvum Opus or part of it may be reproduced only with permission, but you may forward the entire newsletter as long as the copyright remains.